budge burgess ... for the stories you don't write
the longest suicide note in history
Goodbye cruel world? So you want to change your life? Who doesn't? Who couldn't imagine a better life, a better world? Who wouldn't turn the clock back, do something differently? Who hasn't thought, "If only I'd ...", "If only I hadn't ... "?
Want to change your life? Want the pain to stop? Want love, happiness, fulfilment, excitement ... a future to embrace, a chance to go to bed at night welcoming sleep and anticipating a bright awakening?
Change the world!
Welcome to 'The Stories You Don't Write', an antidote to all that positive thinking, self-help, laws of attraction, make your dreams come true in seven days, patronising bullshit!
No, you're not being sold anything - there's nothing to buy. The future is something in which you invest, not something you can purchase off the peg.
And, No, I'm not offering an easy steps, simple formula to swell your confidence or penis (if you have one) - I won't stroke your ego, won't feed you stale platitudes or freshly buttered parsnips.
This is a website about personal change, political change, social change, economic change. It's a website about creative change, artistic change, a website about adventure and hope. It's an optimistic website, exploring imagination and possibilities.
Above all, it's an honest website - nobody writing self-help books will ever tell you about their political affiliations and beliefs, they'd lose sales. So, be very aware of my next paragraph.
This is a website written in a time of change. As a Scot, I voted YES in the Independence Referendum, I'm a member of the Scottish National Party and voted for an SNP candidate in the landslide victory of May, 2015. Change is in the air, you can't live in Scotland without being aware of it.
This is a website about real change, an attempt to wrestle the subject away from the manipulative, patronising, commercial market of change books and change merchandise.
You could fill a library with books promising to make you rich, healthy, happy, confident, irresistibly sexy, self-important, or whatever ... all by following a series of simple rules.
You can spend a fortune having your aura dry cleaned, your shakra pressed and ironed, your furniture realigned. You can agonise over what to wear while you sweat in a wigwam, run across hot coals, discover levitation, or talk to an angel.
You can trawl the websites and buy coaching or therapies, CDs or DVDs, seminars or distance learning courses all "proven to transform your life in days" ... well, maybe weeks.
It's a market, a huge market, nothing more nor less. You won't find a book which works! If just one diet book did, just one, there'd be no obesity, everyone in the West would be fit ... and sales of sugar rich or fatty foods would plummet.
Of course, around the world, millions would continue to starve or die through lack of access to food, fresh water, or medicine ... but new markets would open up and new millions would be sold a glut of cheap cigarettes, burgers, and sugar-loaded products.
But don't listen to me, I'm just a cynical bastard ... if honest enough to be up-front about my politics.
I'm Budge Burgess. For a quarter of a century I worked providing a 'talking cure', worked in the profession of change. Unlike the authors of most self-help and motivational books, I don't claim to have built a successful coaching or counselling practice helping the rich and famous. I wouldn't want to.
I've never provided consultancy services to any of the world's major corporations - I haven't even stuck a postcard in the window of the newsagents across the road. I loathe the effects of capitalism and wouldn't want to become any more of a slave to it.
Nor have I spent decades studying at the feet of the world's leading thinkers. I never completed my doctorate - a real one, not a mail order one. However, I never stopped thinking, and reading, and watching, and listening, and thinking again.
I have spent decades in a range of entertaining pubs, thinking, listening, and arguing about the world with a wide cross-section of people - some of them complete dipsticks, some of them amazingly knowledgeable and insightful, some of them simply entertaining, some of them hurt and hurting.
My professional career saw me working on the streets, with the homeless, with the detritus of society, with people whose future was no more distant than the next drink or next syringe, with the poor and rootless, with thieves and murderers.
These people aren't evil. They're not subhuman. Most are no different from your average, ordinary working man or woman. They made a wrong decision, found themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time, or had the simple misfortune to be born into a shitty home and into a downward spiralling life.
There but for fortune! If you're dissatisfied with life, you should see what real shit is like, what real pain is like, what real poverty and desperation are like, what real hopelessness is like!
There but for fortune. Most of us are only an accident, an injury, an illness, a mistake, one life changing event away from the streets or the courts, or worse. Life can be unpredictable.
So, a website about how to change your life, one which doesn't promise anything, doesn't offer a quick fix or some guaranteed formula which will signpost the way to your dreams. A website which seems to be celebrating the fact that it's no fucking use to anyone.
A website which, instead, says, "For fuck's sake wake up, get your head out of your arse, take a good look at yourself and your life, and stop reading all those delusional articles in the glossy magazines - they either make you feel inadequate or envious!"
Nevertheless, if you want to change your life, or to help someone else change, you WILL find ideas here.
You WILL find some of the right questions to ask - but I won't promise answers.
You WILL find new perspectives on change and may even gain a better insight into your life and future.
And if, from time to time, I make you angry, you WILL be better equipped to recognise the bullshit, hype, fraud, spiritual dross, and looney tunes bollocks which pretty much monopolises the bookstores and Internet.
If you want to change your life - or find out why I'm talking about suicide - read on!